Self Improvement Information

Chances are that you grew up in a two-parent family, a mom and a dad. Went to a local school, away to college, married, had children of your own. And then, tragedy struck and your mother passed away, leaving your father a widower. He has mourned his loss and, in time, while still embracing the memories of your mother, met someone new and fallen in love, ready once again to enjoy a full life, perhaps to even re-marry, and you find yourself exchanging parenting roles as you concerns are not unlike that of your parents when you dated, fell in love and eventually married. While their expectation is that you will be thrilled when your older parent finds happiness in remarriage or has someone special in his life, it is seldom that simple.

It could be that you have been protective of your parent, especially caring since he became a widower and are uncomfortable with someone else taking over your role. Or perhaps this new person is assuming the role of your much-loved deceased parent. You may perceive the new partner as competition for your parent’s time or may have difficulty thinking of your parent as a sexually active person, especially if your parent’s involvement is with a younger woman.

Although the choice of mates is solely that of your parent, he will, naturally, be influenced by your opinion, suggestions, feeling and certainly your actions. As such, be aware that the more accepting you are, the easier it will be to deal with the problems intrinsic in blending and re-blending families. You can lessen the pain of assimilating new people into family gatherings, for example, by being welcoming and flexible, with a willingness to establish new family traditions.

Often there are financial or inheritance issues that can be sticky. In this case, try seeing things differently. Try to think of your new family members as more people to love you and your family as an extended support system.

With a life of your own and different priorities than when you were younger, consider what’s really important and allow the small things to fall by the wayside. Establish weekend visits, holiday meals, occasional celebrations, perhaps vacations together in a new way. So what if your parent’s choice is not ideal. Be appreciative that someone cares for your father. Consider these suggestions:

• Do try to put yourself in your parent’s shoes and consider how difficult it might be for them to be caught in an emotional tug-of-war between their new love and adult child.

• Do keep reminding yourself that your parent is an adult and has the right, and smarts, to choose their new mate.

• Don’t put your parent in the position of having to choose between your love and that of their new mate when both are important to their sense of well-being.

• Don’t discuss issues such as family inheritance, your late parent’s possessions, and your feelings of being pushed aside by their new love when angry. Try to understand where your angry feelings are coming from so that you can calmly discuss your concerns with sensitivity and caring.

Keeping the channels of communication open for discussion, dialogue and sharing of experiences requires listening, and not necessarily agreeing. Each party needs to be heard and wants to be understood. Joy is to be treasured; the challenge lies in working it out in a way that is respectful to family members. The reality is that being gracious takes less psychic time and energy, and you may indeed grow to like, even love, your parent’s new spouse or partner. Family harmony often means only relatively minor-changes in long held perceptions or entirely new perspectives that genuinely reflect your own maturity.

From THE HEALING POWER OF GRIEF: The Journey Through Loss to Life and Laughter (ISBN 1-932783-48-2) championpress.com/grief/healingpowerofgrief.htm and THE HEALING POWER OF LOVE: Transcending the Loss of a Spouse to New Love, championpress.com/grief/healingpoweroflove.htm (ISBN 1-932783-51-2) by Gloria Lintermans & Marilyn Stolzman, Ph.D., L.M.F.T., Champion Press, 2006

THE HEALING POWER OF GRIEF is the grief recovery book everyone’s talking about and includes a valuable “Healing Power of Thought” workbook. This book is written in everyday language to which everyone can relate while being gently guided through this heartbreaking time.

THE HEALING POWER OF LOVE is a collection of heartwarming, intimate stories of how 24 widows and widowers grieved and healed, and while embracing loving memories of their late spouse, went on to new loving, committed relationships…a unique perspective on this subject.

Visit with Gloria Lintermans at: creativegrief.blogspot.com/ creativegrief.blogspot.com

Gloria Lintermans is the co-author with Marilyn Stolzman, Ph.D., L.M.F.T. of THE HEALING POWER OF LOVE: Transcending the Loss of a Spouse to New Love; championpress.com championpress.com

THE HEALING POWER OF GRIEF: The Journey Through Loss to Life and Laughter is a grief recovery book and includes a valuable “Healing Power of Thought” workbook. This book is written in everyday language to which everyone can relate while being gently guided through this heartbreaking time. THE HEALING POWER OF LOVE: Transcending the Loss of a Spouse to New Love is a collection of heartwarming, intimate stories, how 24 widows and widowers were able to follow their grieving with loving new relationships…a unique perspective on this subject.

Visit with Gloria Lintermans at: creativegrief.blogspot.com creativegrief.blogspot.com

We experience failure directly or indirectly. Here we will come to know about the meaning and the mighty types and reasons of any failure.

All failures have emotional aspects which colors the person’s reaction to this failure and to the situation in which failure occurred. While personal reactions are different to predict the common reactions are self-negation, self affirmation, the use of defense mechanism, motivation, expectation for future success and changing goals. Failure is always ego-deflating and thus effects the personality unfavorably.

There are two types of failure : A] SUBJECTIVE and B] OBJECTIVE

A] SUBJECTIVE FAILURE:- In this, person believes that he failed because he as not measured up to his own hopes and expectations and this has a more damaging effects

B] OBJECTIVE FAILURE :- This failure is judged by others which becomes more damaging when judgment is made by person who are important to the individual.

Now let me clarify the reasons by considering above types of failure these are as follows.

1] Unfavorable environmental influence During Childhood |- This is the most dangerous reason than any other reasons epically in the home, if child is always criticized, discouraged, nagged, overprotected and has improper – a] Love n affection, b]imbalanced & improper motivation, encouragement, inspiration & determination. When child lacks in these areas he will definitely have problems with – Targets(goals), will-power, endurance, persistence, sustainability & tolerance; Which are the basic elements to have success or failure and if child has problems in these areas then more problems will occurs in professional, personal & social life & career – That’s why its most dangerous.

2] ILL HEALTH |- Over-eating, wrong eating habits, Smoking, drinking, tobacco and so on ; these things damages the nerves and gastrical coordination and hence every body part gets affected badly and at times very slowly.

3] Procrastination |- It means that the person always thinks that “right time will come…” forget, time will never be, just do it right now, start where you stand, work whatever you can or whatever tools you have. In other words procrastination is the ability to put things off or not able to take initiatives. Procrastinated person is not a poor starter actually he doesn’t start anything.

4] LACK OF PERSISTENCE |- Means lacking in endurance- sustenance and patience area. We know people who are good starters & poor finishers or trying multiple this several times. It has no substitute and are prone to defeat.

5] INDECISION |- Its inability to take decisions or fail to take decisions. Procrastination & indecision are twin brothers and work together.

6] SELF-DECEIT |- Here, people are very indifferent or lazy to acquire facts with which they require to think accurately; these peoples prefer to acts on their own opinion created by guesswork without any judgment & this is bad for success and decisions.

7] Other common reasons are –a] Lack of ambition b] Insufficient knowledge, education and discipline, c] over caution, prejudice, intolerance, wrong selection, vanity, ego-dominance, criticism, hatred, lack of enthusiasm & efforts.

If you are a parent please think seriously on reason first coz it’s a root and the base element and what ever you are think it all.

Analyze yourself, you’ll get more help at brendynamics.com/gr

About Author : Nilesh Gore :
Professionally author is graphologist & psychological counselor, founder of braindynamic.com & involved in Personality Assessment, personality Development, helping people managing their strengths & weaknesses through expensive SWOT analysis and personality tests.He is also working on ‘Graphotherapy’ i.e. managing emotional health via handwriting. He has also written several articles for several websites. you can contact him on following addresses.

Email : mailto:ng411002@rediffmail.com ng411002@rediffmail.com

Web : braindynamic.com” target=”_new braindynamic.com
Country : India, Bhusaval, Ms
Copyrights : © Nilesh B Gore

When was the last time you heard a news report about an organization whose sole purpose was to spread love and unity on a global scale?

Let’s call the organization, for lack of an established term, an “amorist” organization — the opposite of a “terrorist” organization. Do any of these exist?

If you heard about an amorist organization on the news tonight, would your interest rise? Is it possible that a glimmer of hope would spring up inside you, knowing that people around the world are creating positive change in this spirit? Would you smile after learning that these “amorist cells” have been meeting and organizing in living rooms and spiritual centers for the past several years, quietly and without fanfare? Would you consider joining them?

Let’s imagine one for a moment. Let’s pretend that we’re watching a news report about an organization that is positively transforming people’s lives worldwide. But what would such an organization look like? How would they spread the message?

Maybe the organization would call itself “a civil rights movement for the soul.” Maybe the purpose would be to communicate and implement the belief that we are all one, one with God and one with life, in a shared global state of being, so that the behavior of humanity could shift to reflect this understanding. Maybe people from all walks of life would come together in countries all over the world. That’s nice to imagine —isn’t it?— a movement toward unity that spans from Asia and Australia to India and China, and from Africa and the Middle East to Europe and the Americas — people of all walks of life coming together under this banner. That might make John Lennon smile.

But in the face of the dauntingly complex dynamics of the world today, how can ordinary people imagine that they have the power to make a difference? What can any of us possibly propose as a way of resolving the host of economic, political, military and social problems?

Here’s one answer that has incredible power: Shift what you believe and the world shifts with you.

It was once said this way: “I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours … everything is possible for him who believes.”

It has also been said this way: “All wrongdoing arises because of mind. If mind is transformed can wrongdoing remain? We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.”

And this way: “Man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he is.”

Or this: “You will not enter paradise until you have faith.”

While religions have formed around the people who said these things, wouldn’t it be nice to have an organization that is not tied to any religion, that is not about creating a new one? Perhaps a much more effective goal would be to create a space for a New Spirituality to emerge, a spirituality that would enhance and enlarge the world’s religions; update them, refresh them, rendering all of their current sacred teachings even more relevant to our present day and time; a spirituality that would recognize all we share while celebrating our differences.

This shift embraces a very intriguing idea, that the root cause of global conflict and suffering is the same as the root cause of individual conflict and suffering: It comes from our cultural values and most sacred beliefs — in other words, our spirituality: what we believe about ourselves, about life and about our relationship to the divine. From this viewpoint, political, economic and military problems are merely by-products of a spiritual problem.

Therefore, if we believe that we are inherently bad, born that way, we will experience ourselves in that way in all aspects of our lives. If we believe that we are not connected to each other and separate from our Creator, we will experience ourselves in that way. If we see our Creator as a punisher, as a being that gets angry and greets misbehavior with endless physical and mental torture, we will live in fear of divine retribution.

An amorist organization might ask people to open their minds to the possibility that our current theologies may be limited in what they understand.

It wouldn’t ask anyone to condemn or abandon their religions, nor suggest that religions don’t have the best of intentions. Rather, it would ask people to examine their belief systems, to courageously explore new understandings about God and life, and if those new understandings align with their personal inner truth and knowing, enlarge their belief systems to include them.

It is possible. It is possible that tomorrow night, your local newscaster could report this: “Growing numbers of people are indeed expanding their belief systems to include larger possibilities and larger realities than they might have been willing to consider before. And they are doing this because they recognize that when we change what we believe, we will change how we behave.”

If you would like to see this imaginary news report come to reality, if you can imagine joining the vanguard of a worldwide spiritual movement that will put amorism instead of terrorism on the front pages of newspapers, then consider making this shift.

About Humanity’s Team
Humanity’s Team is an amorist organization with 15,000 members in more than 90 countries. A Humanity’s Team group is probably in your area, and if one isn’t, it takes only one like-minded friend to create one.

For more information about Humanity’s Team around the world, logon to humanitysteam.org humanitysteam.org For the U.S. site, go to humanitysteamus.org humanitysteamus.org

About the Author
Humanity’s Team member Ty Adams is a writer and editor living in Eugene, Oregon. He loves words and is insanely grateful that he can make a living through his passion. After earning his chops as a print journalist in Austin, Texas, he moved on to write and edit for several custom travel magazines in the recreational vehicle industry. He has also coauthored two humorous books on sports performance: If It Ain’t Broke, Fix It! and Sporting Clays Consistency, You Gotta Be Out of Your Mind! A firm believer in following paths with heart, Ty’s most recent project will take him around the country in a biodiesel-powered love machine.

Here are some power questions that will grab your prospective client when you have your meeting.

Stop selling, and start helping. You will see your sales close ratio go up 5-10 times from where you are if you’ve been “selling” during those meetings.

Although this article is meant to show you how to follow up the Information Marketing letters we mentioned in the previous article, this approach still works for almost any sales appointment.

Just keep in mind that “you are not there to sell,” you are there “to help.” There is a clear distinction, at least as far as how the prospect perceives it.

Does that mean that you aren’t going to close, no, you will. However, you MUST be there to help him no matter where that may go. You are there to help the prospect find the answers he needs to solve the problems you are going to help him discover. You will work on HIS problems together heading for the answers. When he finds those answers, he will recognize that you were the one that guided him there. And, in most cases, there is still more work to do. He’ll want you around to help him find more and more answers, and help him implement the actions.

Since you are not here to SELL, you will not be in the TELL mode. You will be coaching him to find his most important answers to his most important problems.

Here are some questions that just might help:

Start your meeting off by asking them to explain what was the most beneficial thing they got from the article (assuming this is the follow up to that information marketing campaign). If this isn’t a follow-up to an information article campaign then just go directly into the questions that follow.

What are your biggest goals for your business this year?What are they worth to you, if you could achieve them?If you could achieve them sooner than expected, what would that do for you?What has been the biggest obstacles to you pulling that off? What might have delayed achieving those on time?If you could solve those problems in the next week or two, what would that do for you?What has it cost you for not achieving those?What is it costing you every week that you don’t achieve those goals?

You want the prospect to define the value of achieving those goals in dollars and cents. What it has cost them in not achieving them. That sets a value for moving forward and a cost for not acting.

You’ll see that most will decide to move forward either at this meeting, or a meeting that follows up quickly.

If the prospect ultimately says he isn’t ready to move forward, what do you do?

Ask him when he absolutely has to have this problem resolved?

Make sure that you know what the weekly cost to him is for every week that this is delayed, because the chances are that the delay is more costly than your fee. This might be worth a discussion before leaving.

When he gives you a date, ask him if he’d like to continue receiving your articles on how to resolve his problems. He’ll be on your list, and it wouldn’t hurt to have some hints and tips about it.

When the date comes up, give him a call. There is a really big chance that he hasn’t done anything to fix the problem. In that case, show a concern that he said it was costing him $______ a week, and you have some other suggestions that might help out. Schedule another appointment to talk it over.

Remember, your fees ARE going to be less than the costs he is facing in not getting it fixed.

You are selling your value, not coaching or consulting. Be able to give a testimonial that shows how much other clients gained from your coaching.

Do you want to learn more about how to increase your coaching businesses? I have just completed my brand new guide to coaching marketing success. You’ll also get a free invitation to join a mastermind group of other coaches as they build their business. Hear what works and doesn’t work.

“We have two ears and one mouth, so that we can listen twice as much as we speak” – Epictetus, Greek Stoic Philosopher. (55AD-135AD)

In our fast-paced culture conversations have little to do with communication – they are about talking. While one person speaks, the others are not hearing what is being said because they are already planning what they are going to say next. How much of what the speaker has said has actually been ‘heard’? What is in your head when someone is speaking to you? Are the words that they are saying to you in there, or is it something else? Have you gone to some other place or are you with some other person, having a separate conversation in your mind? How much attention are you really paying?

Just for once, decide to have a day of listening, not speaking. When someone is talking to you, make a concerted effort to listen hard and comprehend what it is they are actually saying. If necessary, repeat back to them what you think they have said – just to be certain you have really taken in what they are trying to tell you. Give them time to finish their sentences, without jumping in because you think you know what they are going to say next. You may be wrong. This is called ‘active listening’ and is a skill that takes practice.

Suddenly, the communication you have with people is heightened. The more you listen the more meaningful everything will become. People will respond better to you if they feel you are really listening and by ‘hearing’ what others are saying you may find that you learn something.

Kate Harper is a Motivation Coach based in the beautiful Highlands of Scotland. Check out her website totalbusinesscart.com/app/adtrack.asp?MerchantID=66407&AdID=145714 harpercoaching.com

She works with people from all over the world who are seeking change in their lives. If that is you, please take a look at Kate’s website. Her special interests are the promotion of Wellbeing and Self Confidence through her coaching.

“The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult.” Madame Marie du Deffand

Take your first step today and contact Kate.

Go here to get my free 7 day mini e-Course on Procrastination - harpercoaching.com/HC_e-Courses_Menu_Page2.htm harpercoaching.com/HC_e-Courses_Menu_Page2.htm

Since Day ONE of the creation, blokes like you and I searched for that elusive reason to life.

“Why are we here?”

“What is our purpose?”

“Does the world follow some rhyme or reason?”

And check out the great books and authors that elaborated on the idea: Summa Theologica, The Egyptian Book of the Dead, The ‘Quoran, The Bible, Jean Paul Sarte, Socrates, Paulo Cohello, Donald Trump.

Okay, I arbitarily inserted up that last name.

But seriously. You never realized you were in the company of such eminence! Give yourself a pat on the back, Mr. Philosopher.

Stop, and consider how, after all that rheotoric, prose, and giddy exhortation, few of these dissertations truly arrived at some enlightening, jaw dropping Meaning of Life that literally gave you the golden answer to your personal existence. (people still keep searching!)

And Life, well… life just kept lifing along. nu ni nu ni nu

Step outside for a moment. Just humor me on this.

What do you see. Really drink in the detail now.

Okay. There’s a car passing by. Or maybe a tree with some bird poop on it. A cat (hopefully white) passing the street. Oh look! A dog spilling your garbage for you to clean up later!

What did they have in common?

Nothing.

Check again.

Okay… Nothing. Just a bunch of disjointed events.

But one of you might say, “ah I disagree. What I saw was a spirited sports car driver showing off to his girlfriend and experiencing a thrill burning gas and polluting the environment.”

Ah. Sounds like you just gave meaning to some meaningless event.

Or another would say “Man, that dog is out to get me. He spills trash everyday so I have to clean it up”

Oho! Looks like you colored some other event with yet more meaning.

What am I driving at?

Brace yourself.

Here’s the cold hard truth: every event on this planet is meaningless.

Got that?

Life is meaningless. In fact, life has no purpose, no rhyme, no reason. Your life, my life, everyone’s life is empty and meaningless- a void existence formed from an infinite strand of disjointed events that branches out into infinite possibilities based on decisions made every moment.

Squirming? Hear me out.

Take yourself out of the Life equation. Just blink out of existence. Stop. Ponder this: do you think Existence, Destiny, The Universe would suddenly weep and grind to a halt? No way! Life just goes on….. lifing along.

This is the meaning to life: that LIFE IS MEANINGLESS. With or without us, reality endures. But what gives all this some iota of value is that we give it significance. We give it subjective meaning.

You, I and everyone are simply Meaning-Making-Machines that ascribe meaning to what we observe around us.

Got that? Life is empty and meaningless AND everyone is a Meaning Making Machine. That’s the ultimate formula to life.

There is no meaning to the car rushing down the road, to the ferry crossing the channel, to the rocket landing on the moon, to George Bush taking a dump on the royal throne.

There is no inherent meaning to your trudging to work, eking out a living, raising a kid and throwing dishes at your spouse.

These are all events. Random events with no inherent meaning.

I bet you want to strangle me now. Or jump a bridge. After all, if life has no meaning, what’s the point of suffering through it (ah! another meaning)

But let me finish. Put away that .45

So… what’s the point to all this? To life? To these empty events?

Remember what I said earlier?

You are a Meaning Making Machine.

and Life is Empty and Meaningless.

Ask yourself:

What do you do when something is empty? YOU FILL IT UP!

Since you are a meaning-making-machine, you have the mandate to forge your own personal meaning out of all these meaningless events. Simply fill life up with a meaning that is so powerful, so inspiring that you simply must bound out of bed every morning.

It’s that simple. Life is inherently empty, but YOU have the Power to give it meaning.

And do you already realize what kind of power that is? You suddenly open up a whole new world of possibilities!

Think about that.

Did you once think that because you got fired, lost your wife, or got mugged, that life is cruel and demonic?

Or did you think that because you won a million bucks at the lottery that God out there must love only you?

NO!! NO!! NO!! Life is not inherently cruel and demonic. Nor does God favor you any more than the average Joe.

These are rich meanings you ascribed to life simply because of random events.

But wow… how those arbitrary meanings shape your future for all eternity.

Think of how a rape victim would live the next 20 years. “It’s hell. Every man is a monster”

Or imagine how Kiyosaki arises every morning. “Life is great! I earned $200000 more in royalties today”

Get what I’m driving at.

Life Is Empty and Meaningless, but You Have to Power to Give it Meaning.

Positive or Negative.

And how you choose to view life shapes the rest of your fleeting existence on this planet. You literally wield near God-like powers to reinvent your tenure on this world. Did you realize that?

It all depends on the Meaning Life Has For You.

And the best thing about it is: You Chose That Meaning.

More of Joseph Plazo’s killer articles: Art of Unstoppable xtrememind.com Persuasion, Sneaky powerconsultants.net Negotiation Techniques, and finding jobcentralasia.com Jobs in the Philippines

Being a Christian doesn’t insulate you from stress. In fact, finding ways to relieve stress is important for Christians and non-Christians alike.

Because anxiety and stress are pretty much everywhere you look these days, it gets increasingly harder to see what’s causing it. Why are people so stressed? Who’s putting all this pressure on you?

Amidst all the turmoil, if you’re able to step back long enough to answer this question, you will most likely discover that person is you. Yup, you’re creating most of your own stress because of your habits, attitudes, and choices.

So why not just change all that stuff? Everything should be great, shouldn’t it? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if it were just that easy? Unfortunately for those of us who live amongst all the chaos of life, making changes seems to add even more stress. Ugh.

So what are your options? Where do you start?

Spend Time with God. As a Christian, your first line of defense should always be God’s Word. Spending time with God gives you time to relax, reflect, and truly hear what God has to say about everything in your life. Slowly, little by little, God will work with you on areas in your life that need changing so you can relieve the stress.

Cast your care. Does that mean you don’t have to be concerned about what’s happening in your life? Not at all. But it does mean that you TRUST GOD enough to let Him do whatever He’s going to do, however He’s going to do it. Much of your stress comes from your own desire to control everything and everyone. But when you finally come to the place where you are able to give up control, your stress will go down substantially.

Resist the urge to take the problem back into your own hands. When you turn things over to God, it usually starts out pretty well. You’re feeling good, you’re confident that God is working and you believe everything is going to turn out just fine.

But then things don’t change right away. In fact, sometimes things get worse. And instead of staying focused on letting God take care of things, you rush right back in and take the problem back. You go back to manipulating the situation or the people to try to make things turn out the way you think they should be.

It’s as if you had a back-up plan all along, just in case “God doesn’t come through” by the time YOU think He should. So instead of relieving stress, you just make it worse.

Learn the art of patience. In today’s hurry-up world, patience is highly under-rated. People have expectations and they want them met right now, without hestitation or excuses. And when they aren’t met, they proceed to dump stress, not only on themselves, but on the people responsible for the delay. Learning patience is a particularly tough skill to master because you can’t practice it until you actually need it.

There are lots of ways to relieve stress. But, as Christians, wouldn’t it make alot more sense to do things God’s way in the first place? Of course, that means you actually have to read the book and do what it says! What a concept…..

Karen Wolff is the founder of christian-books-for-women.com christian-books-for-women.com, Women will find info, tips, and help with issues like overcoming fear, jealousy, and building self esteem. Find Christian book reviews and recommendations, and “Print & Pray” prayers to help you in many areas of your life.

The Question
Really picture this in your mind…. Someone tells
you that if you ask them for a hundred dollars
they’ll give it to you and all you have to do is believe
it they will- would you ask for it and believe?

God told us in 1John 5:14,15 exactly that. He said
that if we ask Him for anything according to His will
He’d give it to us. He will always do as he said.

We just need to understand a few things before we
can have some of the things we think we want -Like
a two-year old boy who doesn’t understand that the
stove-top gets hot when certain buttons are turned on!

God will teach us and guide our steps if we obey
Him (Psalms 32:8).

The Will of God
It’s not some hidden thing. It’s not hard to
understand. It’s not based on emotions or on what
kind of day God is having!

Humans change all the time as they grow or what
color the sky is in their life that day. God doesn’t.
He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever
(Hebrews 13:8). Everything that He said He’d do
He will do!

How to ask
When you pray, ask believing that you’ll receive and
you will (Mark 11:24). It just sounds too simple
compared to what the world has taught us!

The story we hear daily about doing more and
working harder is really opposite of what God has
told us to do. He said just to believe that He’ll do
as He said would.

Believing
The word ‘believing’ in the original Greek language
actually means having complete trust and having
confidence enough in something to act like it’s so.
It means having the feelings of certainty so that you
do what needs to be done. When God has said
something we’re to know it, trust it, and act on it.

If He were the person who said that He’s give you a
hundred dollars you’d expect it. You’d believe it.
You’d live your life like it was happening. The action
(faith) would be there.

Faith is having enough belief in something that there is action.

If someone in your neighborhood is baking cookies
or is having a barbeque and says that they will give
you some if you come over, would you do it? Would
you if you’re bored and hungry? Would you if they are
making the kind of food you eat? Would you if your
mouth is watering at the smell of the food? Probably!

Faith works the same way really. You know that you
can have something. You were told what to do to get
it. It’s very simple for you to get it. Someone else is
doing all the work and all you really need to do is ask
and believe.

It Really Is That Simple?
God has done so much for us. No matter what
anyone says to the contrary, He has made it very
simple for people to get what He’s said!

Sometimes we have to wait for the food to finish
cooking before we can eat it but we know it’s coming.
We’re to get ready to eat it. God often helps us get
ready to get the desires of our hearts. We have
pleasure in Him and He gives us the desires of our
hearts (Psalms 37:4).

How do we get our pleasure in Him?
Like any relationship you have with anyone you
have to spend time with God to get to know him.
He already knows you. He created you and loves
you!

He’s got much more than a hundred dollars for you!
The more time you spend with God, the more you’ll
love Him. In that love you find yourself having a
great deal of pleasure.

We’ve all too often been taught that our time and
God’s time are different. The simple reality is that
God is a God of now. Repeatedly He showed us
throughout the Bible that it would be done for the
person asking if they were ready in faith (Luke 8:48).

Faith is having enough belief in something that there is action.

Spend the time with God. Read what He has told
you He would do. Spend time thinking about it.
You’ll find yourself growing closer and closer to Him.

You’ll find yourself believing that what He said is
true for you. In that trust, you’ll find yourself acting
more and more upon what He’s told you! You’ll be
receiving what you’ve asked for and more!

Feel free to distribute this article if it is kept as is, including the Resource Box at the bottom. Notification of online use is not required but I would appreciate it. Please contact the author prior to use in printed media.

-Michelle Jacobson
contact@seedministries.com

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Copyright 2005, SeedMinistries

Michelle Jacobson is the author and webmaster
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A teenager drowned in the sea during a Church youth camp. A large group of believers who gathered for a pastors’ convention were all killed in a hotel fire accident. A faithful and talented evangelist acquired acute diabetes and had to have both his legs amputated. A dedicated pastor came home to find his daughters raped and left for dead.

One hundred thirty five years ago, a man named Horatio Spafford wrote an unforgettable song that defied any trace of his anguish over a great tragedy that befell his family. Horatio was a successful lawyer, businessman and prominent Presbyterian elder. He lost his only son shortly before the great Chicago fire in 1871 which took heavy toll on his business, and not long after, his four daughters died in a ship collision in Europe. It was when he sailed to the site where his daughters drowned that he was inspired to pen the words that became the lyrics of one of our most beloved hymns:

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,

When sorrows, like sea-billows, roll;

Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,

Chorus

It is well, it is well with my soul!

It is well with my soul,

It is well, it is well with my soul!

My sin, O the bliss of this glorious thought!

My sin, not in part, but the whole,

Is nailed to His Cross, and I bear it no more;

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

Spafford’s story continues to be a notable source of strength and comfort to many Christians who have experienced pain, loss and suffering in their lives. Until my mother died (she was brutally killed by a robber) two years ago, I was unable to fully grasp the extent of the fusion of horrid agony and unabated hope behind Horatio’s words in that song. My mother’s death brought unfathomable sorrow to my family, and even though I was already a Christian at the time, I found myself unable to hold back the doubt and confusion about God. In that instance, it seemed as if the foundation of my trust in Him that took years and years to build was on the verge of collapse. My mother had just begun to seriously live her faith shortly before she died and for her to have had a death so violent at such a crucial time in her life was not an easy thing to accept.

There is nothing unnatural nor condemnable about Christians, specially those who have tasted despair, to feel a certain degree of apprehension with regards to the future. Pain is real and inescapable. It happens to everyone, including devout believers. The Scriptures abound in passages that encourage us to preserve our hope in God amid life’s relentless cruelty. Yet when tragedies strike, especially inexplicable and seemingly meaningless ones, only a few of us truly find the strength to trust in God.

When a Christian meets unbearable ordeals, how does he move on with his faith in God still intact? How do we reconcile God’s goodness and mercy with life’s atrocities to believers like us? How do we forget our dismal past and move forward with fresh hope?

When the reality of pain in life sets in, we need to understand four things:

(1) God’s sovereignty is absolute regardless of our circumstances;

(2) God’s plan and wisdom are flawless and seamlessly accomplished, but it doesn’t mean that any one of us (i.e., individually) is the center of that plan;

(3) God is perpetually faithful and merciful; and

(4) God favors those who trust Him.

The picture of God as one who is sovereign, faithful and merciful is found not only in a book called the Bible. In one way or another, at innumerable points in our life which few of us really bother to count, the Lord has demonstrated these qualities for us. Unlike many of the Old Testament Israelites who personally witnessed (and greatly benefited from) God’s magnificent miracles and wonders but whose faith swiftly faltered after encountering daunting trials in the wilderness, we need to always be mindful of how God had lavished His benevolence on us so we can remain consistently thankful to Him and steadily expectant of His providence.

Trouble arises when we become presumptuous by thinking that God’s plans revolve specifically around us. We are all part of God’s grand plan of building His kingdom in the sense that He desires redemption for each of us and wants us to witness to other people, but to presuppose that carrying out of every detail in that plan must conform to our individual ideals and enhance our personal circumstances is taking it too far. In the process of executing such plan, God allows the occurrence of certain events that we may not understand but, nevertheless, fall under the scope of His perfect will.

Furthermore, Jesus himself did not promise us total immunity from suffering after believing in Him. In reality, suffering is a big, often essential chunk of Christian life; it is God’s tool for sculpting our character. Our great and unparalleled consolation is that we are S-A-V-E-D. God’s grace is unbelievably boundless—we can rely on Him to make all things in our lives work together for good and to perhaps spare us, out of His infinite compassion, from more agonies (or at least equip us with the necessary strength to endure them) even though we are not the focus of His plan. Much solace can also be drawn from realizing that God knows us and cares immensely for us that He even knows the number of hairs on our head (Luke 12:7). Having a developed relationship with God makes it a lot easier to make sense of life’s difficulties.

The Scriptural passages that convey God’s goodness and reliability are not empty at all. The heroes of faith in the Bible (See Hebrews Chapter 11) gained God’s seal of approval because they acknowledged and embraced God’s authority and faithfulness. Job, Abraham, Moses and the rest of their ilk were clearly not untouched by life’s adversities. In the times that God had a role or task for them to fulfill they were not always privy and central to God’s plans and were thus uncertain of the future. But they all did one thing in common—they kept their faith, and they (or their descendants) were rewarded.

If there is something I’ve learned about God’s trustworthiness since my mother’s death, it is that when life gets too real, He gets even more real in my life. He became more ‘visible’ and responsive to me and my family in many specific, outstanding and often unexpected ways. That God is pleased when people earnestly seek Him and eagerly submit to His will became more meaningful to me. The more life becomes cruel, God all the more shows his goodness and faithfulness to those who choose to trust Him. As life gets tough, I found it wise to acknowledge the pain and reflect on it, then move on by choosing to continue to depend on Him, whether or not I have found sense in my suffering. There is much less sense being stuck in depression or refusing to go on for lack of answers to unanswerable questions. We must accept our finiteness as opposed to God’s infiniteness—our limited minds cannot possibly decipher everything that transpires. These, I believe, are the core foundations that fueled Horatio Spafford’s overflowing contentment in God’s grace even at the darkest hour of his life, hence his song.

As we continue our journey as Christians, let us do so with courage in our hearts. It would do us good to liberate ourselves from the darkness of the past by remembering how God’s faithfulness far outweighs all our miseries combined. Let’s forge ahead armed with the unshakable faith that no suffering we could ever have is greater than God’s love or is beyond His comfort for us. Whatever happens, like Horatio, may we find the strength in Jesus to say, “It is well with my soul.”

About the Author: Denise S. Raterta holds a B.S. in Psychology and frequently writes on the topics of counseling and spiritual growth. She relishes writing straightforward, informative and insightful articles on Christian living. Together with her husband, Roy, an evangelical pastor, she draws extreme fulfillment serving in the Lord’s ministry at Christ Online Center, Philippines.

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